“I’ve got this under control.”
For 23 years, I kept telling myself that lie.
As professionals, we’re problem solvers by nature. We troubleshoot, we manage crises, we fix what’s broken. So when drinking becomes the problem, we naturally think we can apply that same approach.
We research the best strategies. We set timelines and goals. We treat our addiction like any other project that just needs better management.
But here’s what 16 years of sobriety has taught me: The very skills that made us successful in our careers can actually work against us in recovery.
Your ability to compartmentalize? It helps you hide the problem longer.
Your high stress tolerance? It lets you function while slowly deteriorating inside.
Your problem-solving mindset? It convinces you that willpower should be enough.
The professionals I work with often come to me after years of trying to “handle it” alone. They’ve read every book, tried every strategy, and still can’t understand why they can’t just stop.
What they discover is that recovery isn’t a problem to be solved—it’s a relationship to be rebuilt.
With yourself. With your family. With the life you’ve been numbing instead of living.
The same intelligence that got you where you are professionally can absolutely serve your recovery. But only when you stop trying to be the sole project manager of your own transformation.
Some battles aren’t meant to be fought alone. Some challenges need a coach. Some things require a team.
If you’ve been trying to “handle it” on your own, maybe it’s time to handle it differently.
Recovery doesn’t have to be loud—but it does have to be honest.
